Davina here. So you may be able to tell from this picture our news - we are having another girl and I am thrilled - although I would have been either way! We found out at our 20 week scan but it has taken some time to sink in - as these things always do but now it seems very real and can’t imagine it any other way.
Deciding to find out sex of baby at 20 Weeks
A lot of people have asked us why we decided to find out the sex of the baby and it is a good question and a hard decision to make in the first place for many people.
For us the first time round with Elfie we needed something concrete to focus on and make the pregnancy more real after an earlier miscarriage just before we got pregnant with Elfie and finding out the sex really worked for us. It was also helpful in terms of names. A lot of people choose not to find out (including Hannah) because they value the surprise on the day and it motivates them through labour. I can really understand this and I was tempted to try and convince Nick not to find out this time but there were two main reasons I didn’t.
The first reason was due to the fact that when Elfie was born I have such clear memories of her being such a massive surprise (despite knowing she was a girl). I strangely thought I would recognise her - I thought I would know her but I didn’t. She was so new to Nick and I and such a wonderful surprise - her personality - the way she looked - the noises she made - everything about her was a magical surprise.
The second reason was that deep down I knew Nick wanted a boy and that effected me and made me want a boy for him. I know people say its wrong to have a preference but I can really understand that Nick always imagined he would have a son one day and this was his last opportunity to have one (we don’t plan to have a third child). I think if we had a boy already I might feel similar about having a girl so can really relate. For this reason it was important for us to find out the sex at the 20 week scan to give us time to absorb the news and allow us to focus our attention of the excitement of having another little girl - which it has and I am so excited!!!!
Being Pregnant in the Summer
Although I have struggled with the heat this summer (especially in London) I have really enjoyed being pregnant in the summer. Last time I didn’t start to show till October and didn’t really have an opportunity to show off my bump and I know its maybe self indulgent but I so love looking and feeling pregnant. I feel so womanly. I love feeling the baby move inside me and stroking her from outside - I love watching my bump grow knowing that she is growing at the same time. Its such a special and magical thing to be pregnant and I want to treasure it as much as I can. Every evening I lie in bed and just watch my stomach move and touch it to feel the little kicks - its just incredible.
Making the 2nd Pregnancy feel more real
This pregnancy has been so very different from the first one in terms of the energy and focus we are giving it. We just simply don’t have the time to talk about it as much as we did with Elfie and so much of it we already know about (that was new last time) that we don’t need to talk about. I have felt a bit sad about this as I want to feel the same excitement that I felt last time. I am just beginning to feel it again now and I think that is due to finding out the sex but probably more to do with starting to make some plans for baby. For example I have made a Wish List of things I want to buy for the baby and a Make list of things I can’t wait to make. I have started to think about the baby’s first outfit and how Elfie, Nick and I are going to make it together and I have started to go over my hospital bag list - eek! I have also started pregnancy yoga again, which is so lovely as you have one time a week to completely focus on your body and the baby and be surrounded by other mums to be and the excitement of it all.
Next month I will share my essential list of baby buys and makes.